
I was afraid of my dad. Even as an adult I couldn’t be alone with him in the same room without trembling. My dad was a veteran of WWII. As soon as he graduated high school and received a diploma, he signed up for the draft at the next table. No young man of able body was exempt. After basic training he was shipped to the Asiatic Pacific Theater.
Whenever the subject of the war came up, dad would laugh and say, “The war was over by the time I got there. I played golf in Japan on Uncle Sam.” He was our dad. We believed him.
But his behavior told another story. He had a terrible temper. He mostly yelled at mom who, if it was summer, would close all the windows so the neighbors couldn’t hear. After his tirade he would get in the car and leave. We wouldn’t see him until the next day.
It seemed to me, our whole existence was an attempt to keep dad from blowing up. Try as we might it never worked. Often mom used the possibility of dad’s anger to control my behavior. I think that is why I was afraid of him.
We girls, at times, would be the recipients of his rage. One time, mad at my younger sister, he took off after her. I stood up to him. Instead of my sister, he took off after me, swearing. That was the first and last time I ever challenged him. Dad’s shouting scared me to death but he never beat me.
Mostly, the turmoil was within him. Mom and my two sisters and I got the overflow. He struggled with depression. This is something I also struggle with. As an adult I recognized this in him. A neighbor pointed out to mom that dad was worse in the spring.
Our family was a church going family but Dad struggled with his faith. It wasn’t until he was in his 70s that a minister took him seriously and started a dialogue with him. I credit that minister for saving my dad from his unbelief. Dad died when he was 81 from complications of heart disease.
To get a more complete view I need to say more. My dad was a brilliant chemist with several patents, a talented woodworker and an industrious entrepreneur. He was a renaissance man.
After dad died in 2008, we briefly looked into his military service and got his medals. At the time I wondered how one received medals for playing golf. It wasn’t until this past year that my mom talked with someone from the army who could interpret dad’s military history.
My mom and sister were asked what dad was like living with. They gave a short description. They were told dad suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD.
They also learned dad was in the battle of Luzon in the Philippines in 1945. He was a member of a team lying, maintaining and taking up the wire or cable of a telephone or telegraph communication system and locating and determining the cause of the line trouble and making appropriate repairs. This was all done while the battle raged overhead. Dad saw a lot. He was in extreme danger. Luzon was a horrible battle.
Dad was awarded the Asiatic Pacific Theater Ribbon and the Bronze Battle Star. He was decorated with the Victory Medal, the Good Conduct Medal and the Army of Occupation Medal in Japan. So he was in Japan after the war. I doubt he played much golf. Dad was recommended for further military training. He was Honorably Discharged.
I have read a couple articles on the Luzon battle from History.com. Luzon was the last battle of the Pacific Theatre. It was fought by the Americans and Filipinos to free the Philippines from Japan. The battle went through the spring which may explain why my dad suffered depression during the spring.
This all makes me terribly sad. Dad was misunderstood. When the Army guy heard we were told dad played golf for the army, he said he’d heard that before. Apparently, it was something the men said to disguise the truth. They decided not to talk about it.
I realize this is just one of the many stories of the brave men and women who fought valiantly for God and country. I am thankful for their sacrifice that stopped men like Hitler, Mussolini and Yamamoto. I am also thankful for the spouses and the children of these soldiers. We also paid a price.
Freedom is never free. Approximately 85 million people worldwide paid the ultimate price during WWII.
This is like salvation which is also not free. It cost the Father the life of His Son. Jesus died so men, women, boys and girls of every race might be forever free from sin, death and hell. Thank Jesus today!
I want to thank my sisters for helping me write this post.
Be Ye Glad!
Copyright © 2020
Lena Rae
All Rights Reserved
Thank you for sharing your family’s story, Lena Rae. Like you said, freedom is not free; the scars of war remain with those who fought AND continue to impact their families.
I was also afraid of my father’s anger, but he did not suffer from PTSD. However imperfect they were, family is still family. It’s great that you and your sisters can remember the good things about your dad. I will do the same myself! Blessings
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In spite of everything we loved our dad and were proud of him.
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Thank you for sharing such a personal story. I’m sorry to hear about the difficulties your family encountered, including your father, and I am also sorry for your loss (his passing). I read a lot about WWII and it never fails to amaze me. Brushing it off by telling you he was golfing was probably his way of protecting you from knowing about all that. *hugs*
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Thank you for caring. It was hard to write but writing gave me understanding and forgiveness. Your input gives me more understand. Thank you. 💗
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Thank you for sharing this. And thank you from the bottom of my heart to you, your family , and your dad for all of the sacrifices you’ve made. All of us wouldn’t have the life that we have without people like you.
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Thank you. Your words are so dear! ❤
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Lena Rae, thank you for sharing this story about your dad and giving readers such a personal glimpse into a part of history. Peace and blessings.
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Thanks for reading. It helps to share a burden with people who care.
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Yes, it does. My post today happens to be about my father too. Only he’s still living. I got his permission to share.
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How good it was for you and the rest of your family to find out there was a reason for your Dad’s anger.
Obviously that was good medicine for all of You.
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Yes, it was good to finally know but I am grieving his death all over again. Not as the first time but I am grieving none the least.
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Oh Lena! Thank you so much for sharing yours and your dad’s story. And I’m so thankful for your dad’s service! It’s heartbreaking to hear how the war changed and affected great men and their families. Not being able to understand the reasons behind his behavior, I know, was so hard for your family. I’m glad you are finding healing from the aftermath of it all. We forgive because we know we also need forgiveness. We love because we need love. We share, because it will always help someone else. Thank you again for sharing with us. I hope you family has found peace. Much love! Renee
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Thank you for your kind words of encouragement. I am grieving again but grieving, understanding and forgiveness brings healing.
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Thank you for sharing this moving story and lesson so vividly
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Thank you for reading it. I appreciate my readers!! ❤❤
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I love that you were able to write this post with your sisters. Very heart grabbing.
Beautiful the way you compared what Jesus has done for each of us.
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Jesus paid the ultimate price that we might be free from sin, death (eternal) and hell. ✝
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My grandpa was in the Battle of the Bulge and earned a Purple Heart. He never liked talking about the war, unless it was joking about how they broke orders and took cheese from the French and poached their cows haha The rest of the memories were too much I think.
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Yes, too much. A man from VA told my mom they also promised one another never to talk about it. My dad did not accept to make jokes like your grandfather. He said a bit about my uncle who was in the Bataan March. He was on full disability. When we wondered why Dad would say he was in the Bataan March. That was suppose to explain it. But it didn’t really. When I became an adult I read about it and the march was just the beginning of the horror. The men in the pacific theater were in extreme danger. My dad was in the pacific theater. Thanks for commenting. 🙂
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Man, that’s rough. It’s strange how we all have our own little histories. But I’m glad learning his gives you more perspective.
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It helped to read about the Bataan March. It also helped to know my dad had PTSD because he was not easy to live with. Interesting to be thinking about his just before Father’s Day! ❤
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